Stoner Sex: Phone Addiction, Suspicion, Hurt Feelings & Two Ladies to Love

Dear Hyapatia,
My boyfriend is always messing with his cell phone. When we sit down to eat, he has his phone in his hand and is looking at it most of the time. When we get high, it’s the same thing. The only time he puts it down is when we have sex. Other than having sex with him all the time, how can I get him to stop staring at it and give me some attention? – Miranda

Dear Miranda,
Sometimes these days it seems like the entire world is staring at their cell phones. This is a common problem and you’re not the only one who wishes their significant other would pay more attention to them. Sometimes we have to take the bull by the horns and come right out and ask for what we want. Sit him down with a good-sized joint. When he takes out his cell phone, start the conversation. Let him know how it makes you feel. Let him know this is important to you. And be sure to let him know that it’s okay to spend time on his phone. That’s important to him. But when you’re spending time together, it’s time to put the phone away.

Dear Hyapatia,
My lady is really sexy and hot as hell. So it’s no wonder she has guys coming on to her all the time. I’ve tried to stop acting so jealous, but lately something has been happening that has me seeing red. We sell weed. Most of my customers are guys and hers are girls. It really doesn’t matter to me if she sells to one of my dudes or if she finds a guy who wants to score a few nugs. But I’ve come home three times now to find her sitting alone in the house with one of my good buds getting high. It seems to me that if he wants to get high, he should wait for me. It just seems suspicious. Am I wrong to wonder? – Jake

Dear Jake,
No, you’re not wrong to wonder. If this guy is a good friend of yours, he should know that he’s overstepping his bounds. One or two times is understandable, but it’s starting to look like it may be planned. If I were you, I’d ask him to call first to make sure you’re home. If he has called and has visited knowing you’re not there, then that’s a red flag and I would bring it up with your girlfriend to find out how she feels. If she’s uncomfortable when he’s around without you, then you need to tell him to stop the visits. Or tell him to find another source of weed. If she doesn’t mind his visits – or is encouraging them – I’d start to worry about her loyalties.

Dear Hyapatia,
We have a growroom in our house. I stay at home while he works. Most of the time, I have no reason to go into the growroom. But every once in a while, I need something from the closet. Sometimes I actually help out in there. There are cameras set up in the growroom, so when we’re not home, he can make sure everything is going as it should be. The last few times I’ve had to go into the room, he has basically interrogated me about it. It really hurts my feelings when he asks me all these questions. I’m either just trying to help or get something that I need. It’s made me feel like he doesn’t trust me or something. So I suppose I’ve been a little less than enthusiastic when we have sex. Last night he asked me if I was seeing someone else. I don’t understand why he doesn’t trust me anymore. I haven’t done anything to make him feel this way. – Lisa

Dear Lisa,
My guess is that when he gave you the third degree about the growroom, he didn’t put two and two together. It probably never occurred to him that his questions would affect how you would respond to him romantically. People often are too busy or self-absorbed to see how their behavior impacts others. And some people don’t recognize that it’s difficult for a partner to be romantic if they’re pissed off or their feelings are hurt. You need to sit him down, get high and have a heart-to-heart. Explain how he made you feel when he questioned you. Let him know how this made you feel when it came time for sex. Give him a chance to make it right.

Dear Hyapatia,
I have never been in this situation before! I know two beautiful, sweet ladies who seem to be into me and I don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings. I like them both very much. I don’t really know either of them well enough to say I want to be with one of them forever or anything like that. But I sure would like to get to know both of them better! How should I go about this so I remain honest and no one gets hurt? – Carl

Dear Carl,
I wouldn’t worry right now about being with one of them “forever.” Get to know each woman separately and privately. Let both of them know that you’re interested in them. Right now, you don’t have to be exclusive with either, unless things develop in that direction. But if you end up wanting to have relationships with both ladies, keep in mind that either one of them, or both of them, may be uncomfortable with that arrangement. Let things develop first and remember that honesty is always the best policy.

Last week’s Stoner Sex: Dancer Truths, Showing Love to Your Lady & the Trump Effect

from
http://hightimes.com/culture/stoner-sex-phone-addiction-suspicion-hurt-feelings-two-ladies-to-love/